My Ebenezer

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And now the Speedster is sick. 102 degrees of sick. Poor baby. I took him to school today (he did NOT Have fever this morning) but I knew he wasn’t feeling good. I should have trusted my gut instead of the thermometer. Oh well, it’s not all bad. I get an afternoon and cuddling and watching movies.

Hey guys, I have a huge favor. A friend who is near and dear to my heart is facing some special challenges and needs some prayers. Please pray that God will put a hedge of protection around her and her husband. Pray that they will experience His grace and His hospitality in new ways every day. Pray for Godly friends to encourage them and build them up during this trying time. Most of all, pray for the work I know He is doing in them and through them in the midst of it all.

As for you, my friend, I am claiming Jeremiah 29:11 for you guys (I know, big shocker with the verse) “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord. ‘They are for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.’”

So, I’m wondering. At what age do the children in your church start attending “children’s church”? Ours go from the nursery to attending Children’s Church and Sunday School at age 3. I’ve looked online and haven’t found another church in the area that offers children’s church for the 3 year olds, most start in pre-k or kindergarden. So I’m just curious. I think 3 is really young and to expect this age group to sit in an auditorium style environment and listen to a story may be asking a little too much.

What has your experience been with this?

When we woke up this morning, Gracey had a low grade fever and she’s been teething so I didn’t think too much of it. Gave her some Tylenol and headed on over to my mom’s because we were going shopping. When I got to mom’s about 2 hours later, Gracey’ fever had gone up a degree so I gave her some Motrin, still thinking it was probably just teething.

We had to go get diapers because I was completely out and by the time we got back to the car, mom’s shrimp dealer had called and we had to meet him for a pickup. Sounds like a fancy drug ring, to me. By the time we got the shrimp home and then got back to the mall, it was 11:30am. Not much time for shopping before nap time but hey, we’re going to give it a shot, right?

We made it to two stores. Really, just one and half. In the second store, Carter is sitting in one of those little cart buggy things with Gracey and he says, “Oooohh… I spit up, mommy.” As I got closer, I could see (and smell) that he had thrown up a little bit on his shirt and shorts. But it wasn’t very much, it was wierd. Carter is ALWAYS putting things in his mouth and twice last week he stuck his hand down his throat and made himself “spit up” a little bit. (why that was fun for a 3 year old, I’ll never know) Anyway, I didn’t think he was really sick but since Gracey had fever also, we just gave up.

As I pushed the buggy towards the bathroom to clean him up a little bit, he turns around in his seat, holds up his hand and says, “Mommy, I just ate some of it.” Then I started dry heaving. I was afraid I was going to throw up in my mouth and end up eating some of it, too.

You’d think it wouldn’t get much worse, but I ended up taking Gracey to the doctor because her temp went up to 103.3. Meantime, daddyo is at his doctor because he hasn’t been feeling great the last few days and has been very “sinusy”. While I’m in the waiting room with Gracey, daddyo calls to say he has a low grade fever.

CAN I GET A FREAKIN’ BREAK, PLEASE?

Everyone is in bed now and my throat is feeling a little scratchy. I just took one of every pill and spray the doctor sent home with daddyo. I’d love to sleep but I need to stay up so I can give Gracey more medicine at midnight – I’m afraid if I go to sleep, I won’t get back up.

Tomorrow is a new day.

When was the last time you went shopping for a halloween costume for an adult? Did you notice any common theme on the ladies’ costumes? I mean, seriously, has Halloween become an excuse to dress up like the whore you’ve always wanted to be or what? It’s really bad. I would guess that 90% of the costumes for adult women looked like hookers. I was very disappointed because I already have hooker clothes, I wanted something different for Halloween.

Anyway, I found some cute outfits for the kids but didn’t buy anything. Carter wants to be a pirate and I thought we’d all dress like pirates but then Brigitte suggested we dress Gracey as a parrot and let her ride on daddyo’s shoulders. As cute and creative as that is, I haven’t yet come across a parrot looking costume for a toddler. Or for an adult. We want to all dress up but I’m thinking now that the boys may go as pirates and I don’t know what the girls will go as.

I had a fabulous idea of dressing Gracey in something totally gross or goblin looking – how many goblin toddlers have you seen walking the streets on Halloween? You know it would be hysterical. Daddyo didn’t think so. Actually, he thought it would be funny – just not for Gracey. Everyone expects me to dress her as a little princess so I thought I could do that, and then make just her face look like a zombie or something. Again, Daddyo shot that down. I know it’s a little morbid, but it would be so funny.

Since the boys are dressing alike, I thought it would be fun for us to dress alike also, but no way am I dressing up like a princess. Maybe I’ll go at Ragedy Ann. Or maybe we’ll go as clowns. Ooooh! I could be a clown and Gracey could be my puppy!!!!! Maybe not. I’m open for suggestions. I thought it would be fun for the whole family to dress as The Incredibles, but the kids are too young for that. So, please, suggestions? Boys are pretty much stuck on pirates…..so what about us girls? Ideas?

This one is for you, HH!

Today I am thankful…..

…..for God’s redeeming love.
…..for my family.
…..for a job that lets me choose my hours and work very little.
…..for Mother’s Day Out.
…..for my friends – the ones I talk to every day and the ones I can pick up with right where we left off before.
…..for the sweet sound of Gracey’ voice saying, “Mommeeee! Up! Peas!” and “UVVVV EWWWW”.
…..for other moms who get it.
…..for the birthparents of my children.
…..for my wonderful church home.
…..for my mother-in-law, who watches the kids every week so I can work.
…..for music.
…..for Carter’s enthusiasm for life.
…..for infertility.
…..for giving me a man who loves me completely, flaws and all.
…..for a sense of humor.
…..for the cross.

edited to add:

I am also thankful that I live in the Great State of Texas, where we not only have the death penalty, but we also have an express lane to get you there faster when there are 3 valid witnesses to your crime. I only wish it could be given out to people like this.

I haven’t had anything really good to gripe about in a long time. I think it’s time, don’t you? Rather than griping endlessly about petty little things that drive me crazy, I decided to compile a list:

1 – but cracks. Please cover them up. They are not attractive. ON ANYONE.
2 – friendly parents. You are not meant to be your kids’ best buddy. Act like a parent. They may hate you for a little while, but if you don’t discipline, it’s almost certain they’ll end up hating you for a lifetime.
3 – Some Working moms. Seriously. I like being a stay at home mom. Don’t act like I’m from another planet. It’s great that you choose to work outside the home. Don’t turn your nose up because I made a different choice.
4 – Advice givers. Look, just because I like to give advice doesn’t mean I like to receive it. Especially from you. yes, I’m talking to YOU. When you become perfect like me, then you may give advice freely.
5 – Perfect Mothers. Get. Over. Yourself. We all know that you are a wreck behind closed doors.
6 – Britney Spears. someone give that poor girl some help.
7 – Angelina Jolie – it doesn’t matter how many kids you adopt, it will never fill the gaping hole in your heart that only God can fill.
8 – girl at the gym with amazing body – really, do you think you need that personal trainer I watch you flirting shamelessly with every day? There are much cheaper ways to get dates, lady.
9 – Husbands who don’t help around the house – yes, I know you work soooo hard all day while your wife just “plays” house with the kids. But do you think it would kill you to do the dishes once in a while? Wash a load of laundry? And just because you are “off” from work doesn’t mean you get to sit on your butt or play golf all day. You are a husband and a father. Act like it. (I’m so grateful that Daddyo is NOT one of these men)
10 – YOU. I mean, can you give a girl a comment once in a while?
11 – Me. Could I be any more shameless?

The moment I’ve been waiting for:

By the end of the day, it was messy, but still cute!

You know, all this time I’ve been thinking that as Carter is maturing, we are about to hit “easy street” as far as behavior goes. Gracey has always been so pleasant and so eager to please.

That. is. changing.

Little miss priss likes to have things done her way. I think we’ll be dealing with temper tantrums before long by the way she dramatically throws herself onto the floor and PRETENDS to cry her little eyes out. And heaven forbid you should help her at dinner time. If she can’t do it herself, she’d rather not eat. Unless, of course, Carter is feeding her. He is the only one allowed to help her with her food.

Not only does she have this new found independence, but she also likes to ask, “why, mommeeee?” when I tell her to do or not to do something. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? She’s not even two yet!

Guess we better buckle up and hang on for the ride.

One of the things that I did for Stella last week was gather her things from the foster home. 3 small duffle bags, a small radio, and 3 garbage bags.

Broke. My. Heart.

When I brought some extra clothes to her, I asked if she’d mind if I moved her things into another bag – I didn’t want to “go through” them without her permission. I found 2 big duffle bags on clearance at Target and moved all of her things from the garbage bag into the duffles. So now, at least she doesn’t have to carry her things around in a trash bag.

I’m making labels for all of her bags – like labeling her bags is going to fix her life. I just want to make sure that her things go with her when she moves. I guess I should really embroidery them so the tags can’t be removed. Everything she owns besides a few pairs of clothes is right now on my living room couch in 5 duffle bags. I should point out that when moving her things from the trash bags to the duffles, I came across no photos. For some reason, that made me really sad. I wonder if she even has a photo from when she was little.

She seems to be making some progress, but then again, she may also be playing me like a fiddle. Frankly, I don’t care. I think she needs someone to be on her side.

How many momentos do you have from the first 15 years of your life? Do you have an outfit you wore as a baby? A photograph? A favorite toy or doll? Special certificates you received? A baby book?

Sigh.

It’s been a rough two weeks with Stella. While I was on vacation, she ran away from her foster home but only for a few hours. I think it was more like leaving to go visit a friend even though she’d been told she wasn’t allowed to do so. To make a long story short, Stella was accused of hitting one of the other foster girls in the head while on the school bus. Let me give you the different versions of the story I heard:

CaseWorker:
I’m not sure what happened, exactly. I don’t have the details yet but I know Stella is at XXXXX.

Foster Mom:
Stella hit so-and-so on the head and left a huge bump. The school called me and told me to come get Stella, that she was suspended from school for three days. I picked her up and took her to the hospital and I don’t feel like the other girls are safe with her in the house, she can’t come back here.

Stella:
Cindy, you know that I wouldn’t lie about this. You know it’s not like me to say I didn’t hit someone. I DID NOT hit that girl. She is mentally retarded and I would not ever hit a mentally retarded person. If I hit her, I’d tell you. I was NOT suspended from school. They looked into it and decided there was no proof that I hit her so I did not get suspended. I was just sent home for the day while they investigated.

Vice Principal:
Stella was not suspended. We did not see enough proof that she actually hit someone so she is NOT suspended.

Interesting. I have to say that from what I’ve come to know about Stella, it would surprise me if she would lie about hitting someone. Don’t get me wrong, I know she lies. But not usually about this. Let me explain. If Stella had actually hit this girl, her response would have been more along these lines: “yeah, I hit that girl. She done what she did and I’m going to beat her down. You can’t do that to me. She was disrespecting me and I’d hit her again.” I’ve actually heard those words come from her mouth before. She isn’t one to shy away from the fact that she hit someone. She likes to hit and she doesn’t think there is anything wrong with doing it.

And why should she? It is what she has seen and experienced her whole life.

Sigh. The fact of the matter is it doesn’t matter whether or not she hit anyone. This is still another move for Stella.

Because I want you to understand as much as possible what it feels like to be Stella, imagine living in a home where the other foster kids are your age but are all MR. The preteen biological child in the family does a lot to care for the other girls and is a great help around the house. However, she is put a position of authority over you as well yet she is 3 years your junior. Stella was treated like she needed the same assistance with things that the other girls needed. In addition to that, she was also constantly reminded that she was “just a foster kid”. I believe one quote from the foster mother was, “I don’t let my own children do that, I’m sure not going to let a foster child do it.” Also said to Stella was something along the lines of, “I’m not about to let a foster child get me disliked by the neighbors.”

So far my experience with foster parents through Child Advocates has not been pleasant. Frankly, they suck.

"Samuel took a single rock and set it upright between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer (Rock of Help), saying, This marks the place where GOD helped us."

1 Samuel 7:12 The Message

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