My Ebenezer

Bleh.

Mondays stink.

This is a really busy week for us and since I don’t have much to write about, I’m going to give you the run down of my week. I know, you’re thrilled, right?

Monday -
9:20 Take Speedy to school at 9:20, come home and play with Princess while I do laundry and clean the kitchen.
11:00 Try desperately to get some work done when she goes down for her nap
12:30 Speedy comes home; feed him lunch in 15 minutes and then leave for our 1pm appoinment
1:00 sit in waiting room while Speedy has his evaluation
3:00 go home and play for an hour, try to check work emails
4:00 make dinner
5:00 feed family; if daddy is home lock myself in my office and try to work
7:00 eat dinner, maybe relax if I’ve gotten enough stuff done

Tuesday
9:15 Take Princess to school
9:20 take Speedy to school
9:30 home to work on a few projects (actual work for clients)
1:00 Grocery shopping
2:15 pick up Princess
2:20 pick up Speedy
2:45 play outside (if it is nice)
3:45 inside and straighten house for Bunco
4:00 start dinner
5:00 hopefully Daddyo is home and I can work for another hour
6:00 setup for Bunco
6:30 Bunco
9:00 relax/sleep

Wednesday
8:00 Princess gets picked up to go on a play date
9:20 Take Speedy to school
9:45 Meet with Play Therapist
11:00 Speedy’s school to setup for Valentine Day Party
11:30 V-Day party
12:30 pick Princess up from friends
12:45 feed everyone lunch then nap for Princess
1:30 rest time for Speedy and hopefully work time for me
2:30 feed Speedy snack
3:00 feed Princess snack and play outside
4:00 start dinner
5:00 feed family / work if daddyo is home
7:00 sit in chair and do nothing

Thursday

9:15 take Princess to school
10:00 take Speedy to play therapy
11:00 - 2:00 entertain Speedy
2:15 pick Princess up from School
2:30 snack time
3:00 play outside
4:00 start dinner
5:00 feed everyone
6:00 bath time
6:30 bed time for kids
7:00 relax time and hmm..well, it is Valentine’s Day…. ha ha ha

Friday
7:00 welcome two additional kids same ages as mine
7- 12ish entertain 4 kids

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Yesterday, we Princess and I dropped off our adoption/foster care application while Speedy was in school. When we were eating lunch (Speedy and I), we had this conversation:

Me: guess what Princess and I did today while you were in school?
Speedy: WHAT?
Me: We took our papers to the adoption agency and turned them in so they would know that we want to adopt another baby.
Speedy: Smiles
Me: Remember how mommy told you that we were thinking about adopting another baby?
Speedy: yes
Me: Well, all we have to do now is pray and ask God to bring us a baby
Speedy: Let’s pray right now
Me: Okay, do you want to pray or do you want me to?
Speedy: I want to pray.
Me: Okay, go ahead
Speedy: Dear God, please bring us a new baby. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
Me: That was sweet, Speedy. God always hears our prayers and now we just have to wait and see what happens. Sometimes God answers yes and sometimes He answers no.
Speedy: He always hears us?
Me: Yes
Speedy: Maybe He’ll bring us some yogurt, too.

This morning, on the way to play therapy as we are listening to the music from “Praise Baby”:

Speedy: Mommy, do you like to be worshipped?
Me: Um….no. I like to worship God - He is the only one who should be worshipped.
Speedy: I like to be worshipped.
Me: You do, huh?
Speedy: Yes, I really do.
Me: How can mommy worship you?
Speedy: By singing to me
Me: I can sing to you anytime, but I only worship God. God likes for us to worship Him. It’s hard to understand - I’ll have to think of a better way to explain it.
Speedy: We worship when we sing.
Me: That’s right. Jesus loves to hear us sing to Him and He is always listening to us.
Speedy: He really loves us.
Me: Yes, He does. Do you know how much Jesus loves you?
Speedy: How much?
Me: A very long time ago, He lived on earth and looked like a man. He died for us, so that one day we can live in Heaven with God. And do you know what happend three days after He died?
Speedy: He came alive again!
Me: That’s right! And now He lives in heaven with God.
Speedy: And in our hearts.
Me: Yes, He lives in everyone’s heart when they ask Him to.
Speedy: He lives in everyone’s heart.
Me: Well, He wants to. But we have to ask Him to live in our heart and when we do, He moves in and He stays forever.
Speedy: Jesus, please come and live in my heart. Amen.

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Has it really been two years? I can’t believe how quickly the time has gone by - each day passes faster than the one before. He’s now been with us longer than he was with his bio-parents. It feels like he’s always been with us and I guess, in a way, he has. In our hearts, anyway.

He’s still as happy go lucky as he was when we first met him an he still has the most infectious laugh I’ve ever heard. Speedy LOVES his new school and is doing very well there. He comes home telling us what sound each letter makes that he learns in school and brings all kinds of artwork home. I’m amazed at how much he seems to be thriving now that he has a teacher who loves him and makes him feel that love and acceptance.

We love you, Speedy.

1 Comment »

I haven’t been writing much lately, I’ve been pretty busy with work and just haven’t been “in the mood”. Actually, I’ve been cleaning a lot again and am happy to report that the kids rooms are spotless.

We’ve started the process to re-certify as foster parents so we will be eligible to have baby placed with us. We still aren’t 100% certain she is pregnant but the general assumption is that she is. I don’t know when she is due, but by my calculations, the absolute latest she can be due is the end of May.

It’s hard to refer to a baby that may not even exist so I’m just going to call him/her Jeremiah. The moment I heard she was reporting a pregnancy, my heart began praying for God’s protection on that fragile little life. I don’t know what God’s plan is, but I trust Him completely. I know you already know why I chose Jeremiah - because God’s plan is for a future and a hope. (29:11)

It’s hard to even process it all - it’s so different from the last time we went through the process. I’ve had the paperwork for a few days but haven’t filled it out yet, not because I’m not excited but just…well, just because. I guess I feel like I have plenty of time. Do I want this baby? Absolutely. When I think about too much, I start to get really excited. But I don’t live in that state of excitement because life is still happening daily around here. It’s confusing for me to understand, I have no idea how to paint a verbal picture of what’s happening inside my heart and my head.

I love our family and our life. I love that things are getting easier with the kids. I love that they are getting more independant. (okay, I also hate that) I love that everyone can walk on their own.

I’m not excited about the exhaustion of having a newborn. I’m not crazy about starting over again. I’m not sure I can handle three kids. I wonder what it will be like if there are serious complications from the drug exposure and the alcohol.

I can’t wait to hold Jeremiah close to my heart and smell his/her head. I can’t wait to watch Speedy and Princess meet their new sibling. I can’t wait to see the miracle God is working on even as I type this. I can’t wait to experience a newborn without the crazyness of having two children at one time.

I don’t know that I can handle it. But I do know that God can. I know that He has equipped me to do whatever it is He will call me to do. I believe Jeremiah 29:11. I believe it applies to me and I believe it applies to Jeremiah. And i’m here to do whatever it is God calls me to.

The one thing I’m not is worried. Strangely, I am completely at peace. Maybe we’ll have a baby in a few months and maybe we won’t. If we handled two at once we can certainly handle one. I’m not at a place where I’ll be disappointed if Jeremiah does not exist. I can not control what happens and have no way of looking into the future. I’m just along for the ride and i can’t wait to see where it takes me.

I can say that I am hoping for another baby. I am praying for a healthy baby. And I am also completely happy with the babies I have. God has blessed us so immensely, I just can’t imagine that there is more…. But I’m ready and I’m willing.

3 Comments »

Who are you people? Who is searching the internet for “diarrhea pictures”? I’d like to know. I have a Blog Stats counter thing and in addition to telling me how many people visit the blog, it also tells me when someone clicks on my blog from a search engine. And what they searched for. EVERY DAY. EVERY DAY. E.V.E.R.Y. DAY there is a search on “diarrhea pictures”. Some time back, I posted about an episode of diarrhea and I posted pictures of the kids at the same time. The title was “diarrhea pictures” so I guess that’s why people get here that way. They must be very disappointed when they realized I do not actually have pictures of diarrhea on my blog.

But what kind of person would be looking for pictures like that, anyway? I’d really like to know. So, if you are one of the diarrhea seeking people, please leave a comment and tell me why you are looking for pictures of diarrhea.

EVERY DAY. I am not exaggerating.

3 Comments »