Saying Grace in ‘Redneck’?
Posted: October 30, 2009 at 3:02 am
My favorite thing about blog stats is reading what a person searched for to get to my site. For example, I see “Ebenezer” regularly and then random things that I must have mentioned somewhere. I used to get a lot of poo related searches….don’t know why. 
That reminds me. I haven’t posted about poo in a long time now. But don’t worry, Mathew will be potty training in another year or so… 
Today, someone stumbled across the world wide web and landed on my little slice by googling “how to say Grace in Redneck”.
What does that say about me?
tags: Redneck humor 1 comment
Because He first loved me
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care
Posted: May 21, 2008 at 4:42 am
As I was driving home from Bunco tonight (Darn Nicole for winning in THREE categories!) I was thinking about baby Mathew. Wondering what in the world is going on with the bio parents and when this sweet miracle child will arrive. Not really worrying, just wondering and waiting and longing. As I came up on an overpass, I looked up and saw the moon in all its glory – yellowish orange, full and HUGE. Just as I looked up to see that, the music started as if on que and this is what filled my heart:
When I survey the wondrous cross…On which the Prince of Glory died, My richest gain I count but loss And pour contempt on all my pride. See from his head, his hands, his feet…Sorrow and love flow mingled down. Did ever such love and sorrow meet Or thorns compose so rich a crown? O the wonderful cross, O the wonderful cross… Bids me come and die and find that I may truly live. O the wonderful cross, O the wonderful cross…All who gather here by grace draw near and bless Your name. Were the whole realm of nature mine…That were an offering far too small. Love so amazing, so divine Demands my soul, my life, my all.
As much as I may be longing for this child, My God is longing even more for me. As much as I may want this child, My God is wanting even more of me. Nothing can I gain – not even a child – means more than the cross. It was a few minutes of peace as i drove in silence pouring out my heart to a God who wants me more than I could ever imagine. I long to hold this baby close to my heart and let him rest his head on my chest. God longs for the same from me. He longs for the same from all of us. I have never met this child and may never even get the opportunity to feel his breath on my cheek, but I love him. What does that say of the love God has for us, His children? How much more, how much greater is His love for us?
Oh, how I love Jesus. Oh, how I love Jesus. Oh, how I love Jesus. Because He first loved me.
For a different perspective on a full moon, read what daddyo showed my sister a few years ago… (and seriously, if you haven’t read about that, you really, really should.)
On the road again…..or not
Posted: September 2, 2007 at 2:22 am
So yesterday was officially our last day of vacation and today was reserved for the long drive home. We anticipated driving all the way home today and having all day Sunday and Monday to recover and get back into a routine with the kids.
Funny thing about plans………they don’t always work they way you think they will.
We decided we’d have breakfast on the road and were looking for a doughnut shop. We weren’t having much luck on the main highway so we headed back towards the coast and thought we’d surely find a shop along the scenic route. I know what you’re thinking right about now…..you’re thinking we got lost along this “scenic route” but you’re wrong, we didn’t get lost.
We found this quaint little community with no high-rise condos and lots of vacation homes and beach cottages. It was really sweet. I wondered aloud what the beach looked like here (and later in the day came to realize this was stupid because we were only about 30 miles from where we vacationed. I mean, really, how much different could it have been?) We turned onto a road that dead-ended onto a beach and daddyo noticed lots of trucks and boats parked along the shore.
Why not?
I’ll tell you why not. Because we don’t have a four-wheel drive truck, that’s why not. Because it hasn’t rained in a long time on that beach and the sand was very fine, that’s why not. Because we don’t have a winch, that’s why not. Because people there aren’t as friendly and eager to help as Texans, that’s why not.
Needless to say, we didn’t make it very far in the sand, though the second most popular phrase we heard was, “wow, you made it A LOT farther than most people do with a two wheel drive truck”. When the wheels started to spin and the sand was flying, my stomach was sinking just a bit. And I couldn’t help but laugh.
Daddyo started digging the sand out around the tires while I tried to be helpful: ie: taking pictures with my phone while he wan’t looking and sending them to our family so they’d know we’d be home late:
We got stuck somewhere between 8:30am and 9am. Although it was a huge pain in the butt, we weren’t all too concerned and assumed we’d just be delayed an hour or so. Right. Here’s what we heard and experienced soon after getting stuck:
- oh man, that sucks. I’ve been there before. as he waves and keeps walking
- hey man, you stuck? no, we’re not stuck. We were just afraid the truck might continue to roll forward so we dug a three foot hole around the tires. this was the most popular response we got
- you need some help? yes, please No problem, man, I can pull you out. You got a chain? um, no Oooh! neither do I.
- hey, man, I can pull you out. we’d appreciate that You have four wheel drive? no eeeewwwww, yeah, I’m not gonna be able to get you out.
- you stuck? see my mental response above I have a four wheel drive with a big winch and a 30 foot chain….I could get you out with no problem…..our faces light up and we are suddenly hopeful that we’ll actually get to leave but my truck’s in the shop then why the heck did you even stop? To taunt us? To torture us?
- you stuck? I have a four wheel drive and could get you out….but my truck’s in the shop. yeah, we’ve heard that about ten times now and I just don’t believe it anymore. shut up.
And from the tow truck driver we finally got to come out:
- No way, man. I’m not driving out there and I don’t have a long enough chain to pull you out from the pavement. Sorry, dude.
Mind you, I had called about ten towing services and this was one of two who even agreed to pull us off the beach. Unfortunately, we just made it too far, most people get stuck right at the begining, just ten feet or so from the pavement. Not us. We’re from TEXAS. When we do something, we do it BIG. We got stuck about 300 feet from the pavement. 
After about an hour or so, daddyo asked me to take a picture and even posed for the shot:
I love daddyo so much and couldn’t be blessed with a better husband. Most men would have been simply unbearable after just getting stuck. Daddyo kept smiling and laughing about it and just rolling with the punches. Even after four hours of no luck.
The only time he got even a little bit perturbed was when I gently suggested that he keep his pants pulled up so that the people walking by would quit laughing at his plumber’s butt crack. I also suggested that maybe someone would be more willing to stop and help if they weren’t looking at his crack on the walk over. As much fun as it is to laugh at other people’s husbands when their butt crack is showing, it’s embarrassing when the crack belongs to your husband. Daddyo could have cared less. Needless to say, daddyo’s crack is probably all over the internet by now.
Finally, one of the local fishermen came back and he had the biggest, baddest truck with a winch on the beach. Daddyo went and talked with him, and the guy said his truck wouldn’t be able to pull him out. Now, those of you who know daddyo IRL know what a talker he is and how good he is at making friends out of strangers. This guy was a grouchy old local and wanted no part of helping us. Daddyo even played the, “we’ve got two kids who’ve been stuck out here with us for FOUR hours”. The guy was a jerk. It was only after another local, who was extremely kind, talked to him and pressured him a little that he decided to help us out. It took him like less than a minute to get us out – his truck had no problem moving us at all. So FIVE HOURS and $100 bucks later, we were on the road again. 2:30pm.
Ironically, we found four doughnut shops within 15 miles of that God forsaken little town.
We’re in Mississippi tonight and hope to make it home tomorrow. I have to say that the kids were awesome throughout the whole thing. I took them to a little restaurant and we had lunch but mostly they were in the truck with intermittent air conditioning. There was a decent breeze blowing off the Gulf so it wasn’t horrible, but it wasn’t always comfortable either. The kids never got fussy or cranky.
By the way, after we got out we stopped at a gas station to put more air back in the tires and while doing that daddyo stepped on gum. barefoot. And poor guy is soooo sunburned.
tags: Redneck humor, Travels 6 comments
So I Married a Redneck
Posted: January 16, 2007 at 11:25 pm
It comes as no surprise to those of you who know us irl (in real life)Â that daddy-o is definitely a redneck. Some people say that about us as though it were an insult, but we rednecks just don’t see it that way.
“Redneck” can mean different things to different people. Just so we’re clear, when I say “redneck” I’m not talking about the nasty things you may hear that involve racism. I’m talking about the good ole boys from po-dunk-ville who let the grass grow up over the tires of their old trucks and turn their swimming pool into a fishing hole. Yes, those are REALLY pictures of our swimming pool from a few years ago. And yes, that REALLY is a fishing pole in his hand. And yes, he DID put the aluminum boat in the pool and was very proud of it.
You see, that’s the difference between “regular” people and rednecks. Most people might be a bit embarrassed that they let their swimming pool get that disguisting. Not us. We think it was worth it, if just to get the great pictures. And daddy-o was so proud to sit in his boat in his pool.
Anyway, I’m digressing a bit. At this point, if you haven’t already clicked on each of the links above, please do so. It’s worth it, I promise. I should be a little embarrassed at the number of MY OWN posts that prove our redneck lifestyle, but I’m not.
I guess if I’m going to tell on him, I may as well out myself as well. I’ve always been a bit of redneck, too. That’s why it doesn’t bother me to wear my very comfortable soled slippers to Wal-Mart……or to the grocery store…….or to church……with my fat pants and a t-shirt …….with NO make up…..and my hair pulled back in a greasy pony tail. Ya, that was me. So what?
Okay, back to my husband. It is literally freezing in Houston tonight. Temperatures rarely drop down to 32 degrees and almost never stay that way more than a couple of hours. Tonight, we are expecting several hours of below freezing weather. While other, more responsible and more well-respected, members of our community are covering their plants and wrapping their pipes, daddy-o took time to get us ready in his own way. He went to the garage and dug out the sprinkler and put it in the FRONT yard and turned it on low…..so if it does actually freeze long enough, we’ll have a nice “perty” ice sculpture in the front yard. His excuse was he thought Carter would get a kick out of it.
I love my redneck.
tags: Redneck humor 7 comments
A New Low
Posted: August 2, 2006 at 8:33 am
Yesterday morning after I got out of bed and got dressed, I came back over to the bed and sat down to reset my alarm. As I sat down, I heard a thud and felt my body suddenly dropping a foot or so. My self esteem fell with the bed when I realized I had broken it.
That’s right. My butt is so big it broke the bed. :o) You gotta love any day that starts that way.
Why in the world would I admit that to anyone, much less share it with all of blogland? Because it’s just too funny not to share. I’m sure I could make up a much more entertaining story of how the bed broke…….but we’ll keep this G-rated.
So last night I had to get Mr. Stud himself out of bed to fix it because I had forgotten to tell him about it. He was so tired he didn’t notice when he crawled into bed, and it really didn’t affect his side. So until we get it reinforced somehow, we have a stack of old hard back books underneath the bar that holds the box springs. That’s right, folks. I’ve got a stack of books holding up my mattress.
Afterall, we ARE rednecks.