From my heart to yours
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: June 28, 2005 at 12:25 am
God is so good.
I want to share something with you that comes from the very bottom of my heart. I don’t want to get pregnant. There, I said it. AFter 3 1/2 years of trying desparately to get pregnant, I can tell you honestly that I don’t want to be pregnant anymore. I am so HAPPY to be adopting that I can’t imagine having a baby any other way. I know it’s hard to believe and even harder to understand, but it is my truth. It is a testament to God’s Grace and nothing else.
Many people have said to me, “well, now that you’re adopting…….you’ll probably get pregnant!” What I don’t think you understand is that I really, truly do not wish that to happen. If it were to happen, it would show us all that God does have a sense of humor! But it isn’t what I desire. I tell you the Truth, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4. Throughout our struggle with infertility, we prayed for God’s will. We prayed first what He has for us and we prayed the He would help us not to settle for anything less.
Some of you may have heard me say, “I only want what God has for me. EVEN if that means I don’t have a baby….I know that God’s plan is better than my plan.” I feel like I repeated it like a broken record. But those were not just words, they came from my heart and I believed them. I’ll admit that I prayed those words with tears streaming down my face on many occasions, but I meant them. And God has changed the desire of my heart. I know, now more than ever, that what He has for me is far better than anything I could ever want for myself. Praise God for that blessing!
On Sunday, our sermon was on “fighting the good fight”. You know, putting on the belt of Truth, the shield of Faith, the breastplate of righteousness, the helmet of Salvation, the feet of Readiness?? (i think) and the sword of the Word. Very close to that if not it exactly – my apologies to any Bible scholars who might be reading this! 
Anyway, I feel like that is exactly what we are doing right now. We are fighting for our children.
I say “fighting” because sometimes i feel like there are one thousand reasons why we should not move forward in this process. It’s scary and very uncertain. And it seems that just when I’m at my weakest, someone feels it necessary to “share” a story with me about some horrific experience someone they know had when adopting. (i mean, really, when you find out a woman is pregnant do you tell her about every woman you know who has had a miscarriage?) We’re fighting the fear and the uncertainty….the unknown.
Here’s our biggest fear: that we will have a baby placed with us and he/she will not become eligible for adoption and will eventually leave our arms. This is not only a possibility but a very real likelihood. I know that we cannot even imagine the pain that would cause us – but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my God is BIG enough to get us through it. I trust Him enough to carry us when we can’t stand on our own. We have to remember that when a baby goes home to his/her birthmother, it means another family has survived. We have to trust that God is doing something in her life that we may not be able to see. We have to know that we are blessed to part of God’s plan.
God is so good. Have you met Him? I mean, have you ever really met Him? Come face to face with Jesus? He is dying to meet you. You don’t have to change who you are or “clean up your act” to meet with Jesus. The cool thing about Him is that He meets you right where you are. Romans 10:9 says, “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.” He is the fullness that fills all the empty spaces in my heart.
P.S. we are going to be parents. It seems so close yet so unbelievable! There is a crib setup in our house. I can’t believe that. Sometimes I go in the nursery and touch it jsut to be sure….
Don’t stop the Comments! Keep ‘em coming!
8 Months Pregnant
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: June 29, 2005 at 11:21 am
That’s what Daddy-O said the other day. “I feel like we’re 8 months pregnant now.” He’s very excited about the adoption and can’t wait. We’re even having serious discussions about names.
We were looking at diaper bags in the store the other day and he said, “I am NOT carrying anything pink or frilly around when I take the kids out.” Those of you who know me understand his predicament. I love all things pink and frilly and my biggest obsession is with purses. A diaper bag is like getting another purse! Woo-Hoo! If I go through diaper bags like I do purses, I should go ahead and buy stock in Babies R Us now because I have a lot of purses. And I have to tell you, I’m pretty stinkin’ excited about getting a diaper bag.
Anyway, Daddy-O kept saying, “where are the camoflauge bags?” Of course, there weren’t any….but I did some snooping on the internet and I found one for him. I ordered it and it should be here this week – I know he’ll be excited! A camo diaper bag? Really, now…who ever thought of that?
tags: Adoption, UnCategorized 4 comments
Scrapbook Pages
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: July 2, 2005 at 2:54 pm
Okay guys, I’m off for the weekend with some friends at the lake. Before I go, I wanted to share a couple of pages with you from the mini scrapbook I have to do for the adoption. We had to put some pages together with pictures, that showed a little about ourselves and our families – this is so our agency is able to “introduce” us to CPS and any other workers involved in a case. Anyway, to make a long story short, here are two of those pages. First, the dogs:
The second page is my favorite. Now, I know there are many more people than what I could fit on this page who are excited to meet our babies! We tried to be fare and include our parents, a sibling for each of us and we threw in some friends just to mix it up a bit! ha ha We’re trying to look well-rounded!
Anyway, I hope everyone has a FABULOUS holiday weekend! Be safe and stop and thank God for our Independence, our Freedom, and for those who still fight for it today.
tags: Waiting/Preparing 4 comments
Yes, Brittany, Life Jackets do float
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: July 5, 2005 at 2:16 pm
As we were floating in the lake this weekend, I looked at Daddy-O and said, “guess we won’t get to do things like this after we get the kids, huh?” Don’t get me wrong, i know we’ll still have lots of fun and get to do stuff together without the kids sometimes, but it really hit me.
It’s hard to imagine how different life will be, but it’s also very exciting. This Thursday, at 5:30, our case worker is coming back for the final home visit. After this visit, there really isn’t much else to do. I’ll be sure to let you know once we have our meeting and know exactly what to expect next.
When we got to the lake house, our friend’s mom told us that there was now a celebrity who owned a home on the lake. Patrick Dempsey recently bought a place there and, as luck would have it, we saw him on the jet ski! In fact, and you know i have to add this, he waved at me. That was my big brush with fame.
Before I go, one last thing. Big thanks to my friend, Brigitte, who brought me the best Adoption book today! It is so cute! It’s actually for kids and will make a great story book for our kids when they get a little older.
And I have to include my favorite quote from the weekend: says Brittany, (looking for something to float on before jumping in the water) while holding a LIFE JACKET in her hands, “Will this float?”
tags: Misc, Waiting/Preparing 5 comments
Last Call
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: July 7, 2005 at 8:24 pm
Tonight was our final meeting with the case worker. I think I was a little off on my estimates of when we might be totally finished. Here’s the run down:
- Paper has to be finished – our case worker has to finish everything up and this may take her a week or more b/c she has 2 other cases that are being fasttracked
- Case Worker will present us to the committee for approval – Committee meets on Monday nights. It isn’t likely that our paper work will be finished before Monday, July 11 but hopefully it will be by Monday, July 18. It is possible that we won’t be presented until July 25, but realistically, I’m thinking July 18 is probably it.
- Once we’re approved, and we are assuming that we will be, then our paper work will be gone over with a “fine tooth comb” by the director. She’ll make any necessary corrections and then both she and the case worker have to sign off on it. This could take a week, could take two. We’re at their mercy.
- Once that happens, then everything is submitted to the state so that we can get our license to be foster parents. If I remember correctly, this can take up to 2 weeks as well.
- For now, all we can do is wait.
Realistically, we should be through and licensed by the end of August – possibly mid-August. I know it seems frustrating, but God’s timing is perfect. Please pray that all involved (case worker, committe, director) will do what is necessary at each step so that we can get through this process as smoothly and as quickly as possible. Remember, God is in control. Even of the paperwork!
Phil 4:6-7
6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. NLT
tags: Adoption, Waiting/Preparing 4 comments
All Striped Out
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: July 9, 2005 at 11:15 pm
I almost spelled the title, “All Stripped Out”…guess that would have gotten your attention, huh?
Hey Judy, Tina says you like the bigger font….I hear that the eyesight is the first to go…….
The stripes in the nursery are coming right along. It’s starting to come together but I’m still not finished. Keep in mind when you look at the picture that the colors are difficult to capture with my camera AND when I am all finished, you won’t see as much of the darker yellow color. Anyway, I’m tired but I hope to finish this tomorrow. Next, I want to paint the playroom.
It’s so exciting to be preparing a nursery – I still can’t believe we have a room designated as “the nursery” in our house. It’s crazy. Ironically, I am in NO HURRY and almost relieved to know we have at least another month and half or so before we can get kids. (remind me of that in a few weeks when I’m tired of waiting) I don’t know why I’m feeling that way now, I guess maybe it’s just sinking in that it won’t be long before we do have children – 24/7. It’s a little scary to think that my Sunday afternoon naps may soon be a thing of the past. (at least for a while)
It’s not just the naps and trips and time alone that concerns me. It’s the fact that we will be responsible for another human life. A child will depend on us for food, shelter, clothes, love, etc… It’s that word DEPEND that gets me – it will be up to us to provide a safe, loving home for that child 24/7. Did I mention the part about us being responsible for another human life? Does that scare the crap out of anyone else out there?
Anyway, the latest pictures of the nursery:
Life Goes On…
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: July 16, 2005 at 10:30 pm
It seems like the whole world should stop and hold it’s breath with me as I wait to see how things go with my family….. but people all around me are going on with their daily lives. I don’t understand how this is possible. Why isn’t the rest of the world hurting with us? I’m sure the person who most wants things to go on as normal is my dad – he’s had all us girls fussing over him and mom for a whole week now and he’s bound to be sick of it. Ha ha ha
Life does go on and even I got something done today.
The painting of the nursery is finished! Woo-Hoo! I know what you’re thinking, “where are the pictures?” I’ve decided to wait until tomorrow, after we get the chair rail up to take and post pictures…..so you’ll just have to wait. We painted the chair rails this afternoon so they should be ready by tomorrow…..and it’s going to look fabulous. I’m getting very excited to put all the furniture in place to see what it finally looks like.
Even more exciting, our home study worker called this past week and although she ticked me off, she did tell me that we’ll be presented to the committee this Monday, which means technically we could start getting calls as early as the last week in July. Our paper work will still have to go to the state for licensing but if they were to find a match for us, they could expedite that. So, I’ll let you know when we get the call to say whether or not we are approved. And tomorrow, I’ll post pictures of the nursery.
tags: Adoption 2 comments
Speechless
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care, Foster Care; Adoption
Approved!
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care; Adoption
What do you think?
Tags: Adoption, Foster Care, Foster Care; Adoption
Posted: July 19, 2005 at 11:22 am
If we have a girl, here’s the bedding we’ll use – i think it goes well!
Now, you’ll have to use your imagination on this one. If we have a boy, keep in mind all the dark pink will painted over with dark blue and light pink with light blue. But here’s what we’ll use:
